Spring Cleaning

I feel bad about not writing here more often but this new job designing the logo and menu for a restaurant had consumed so many computer hours and so many brains cells apart from hours of sleep. I wake up in the middle of the night and the whole job invades my brain.

I know I can do a fairly good job but it has been a while since I used the programs needed to design this stuff so I found myself a bit rusty at the edges, spending way too much time trying to figure out how to do stuff I used to do in a daily basis 10 years ago.

Oh yes, it has been that long, sure I had done a logo here and there in the last 10 years but now I have a bunch of new software which in theory should make life easier but since I am learning them on the run ends up making me feel a bit anxious about how to get the final product to look just as I want.

I must admit that one thing that aggravates the problem is my visceral allergy to phone calls. I just don’t do phone easily, somehow I feel I must have used all my phone hours while I was a teenager and now it is always an agony to use the darn thing. The problem even applies to friends but when it concerns clients or suppliers it grows to an almost paralyzing phobia. I basically loose the ability to get the words from my brain out of my mouth, my language skills also suffer and I am afraid I must sound like a moron because I truly feel like one.

As anyone can see I have been overanalyzing the whole thing, not that it will help an iota but it is one of those rollercoaster emotions, and even medicine induced patience( in the form of a low dosage Xanax) is just not cutting the cheese.    

I do know that the core of the problem is intimately related to pride. I hate to admit I don’t know something. Something I should know, or have known how to do. Blogbi tells me I can be a bit more rational about it all,,,,, mmmmkay , sure no one knows everything,,,, sure one is not born readymade and full of knowledge ,,,, there is that old thing called learning,,,, it is a process and takes time but has been proved to work. So I will learn. Next time I will be better. Especially if next time comes soon enough and I don’t have time to forget the stuff!

No Mom it is not Alzheimer’s . I think it has to do with storage capacity. I need to get some stuff out of my brain to have space for new stuff.

Brain Spring Cleaning Is Overdue!